his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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