Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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