Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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