WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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