He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
