also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
