If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I just found puke in my bra..
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
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