theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
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