How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize