At least make sure they are 18
Why
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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