Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
