I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
