the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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