I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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