My brain says no but my pants say off.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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