help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
