getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
