My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize