oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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