Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
