? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Randomize
