WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
