he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize