I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
