The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
