is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
