i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
