Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(216): View more from Ohio

guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight

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(216): guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight http://tfl.nu/30xi

Replies (16) Good night (4390) Bad night (882)
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(815): View more from Illinois

have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?

(1-815): View more from Illinois

why can't you just be normal

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(815): have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u? (1-815): why can't you just be normal http://tfl.nu/06xb

Replies (78) Good night (4829) Bad night (3136)
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(740): View more from Ohio

becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.

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(740): becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard. http://tfl.nu/avz2

Replies (6) Good night (970) Bad night (2594)
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(386): View more from Florida

I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.

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(386): I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music. http://tfl.nu/9pnm

Replies (31) Good night (7829) Bad night (1305)
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(661): View more from California

What a dumb baby whore.

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(661): What a dumb baby whore. http://tfl.nu/17ck

Replies (4) Good night (1235) Bad night (771)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks

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(918): All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks http://tfl.nu/j9e3

Replies (13) Good night (2039) Bad night (527)
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(303): View more from Colorado

I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.

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(303): I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls. http://tfl.nu/h774

Replies (2) Good night (1309) Bad night (480)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room

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(502): Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room http://tfl.nu/pqte

Replies (3) Good night (900) Bad night (730)
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(817): View more from Texas

Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.

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(817): Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter. http://tfl.nu/zoc6

Replies (6) Good night (511) Bad night (1385)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA

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(931): I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA http://tfl.nu/dpqi

Replies (5) Good night (378) Bad night (1058)
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(302): View more from Delaware

I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.

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(302): I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever. http://tfl.nu/6hp3

Replies (2) Good night (848) Bad night (373)
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(763): View more from Minnesota

Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.

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(763): Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge. http://tfl.nu/dfv5

Replies (1) Good night (668) Bad night (244)
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(206): View more from Washington

I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.

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(206): I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart. http://tfl.nu/h3lf

Replies (4) Good night (962) Bad night (343)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.

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(201): I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever. http://tfl.nu/v0jl

Replies (1) Good night (670) Bad night (287)
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(970): View more from Colorado

Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.

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(970): Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way. http://tfl.nu/gitq

Replies (0) Good night (277) Bad night (624)

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