you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize