I think scott just propositioned me for sex
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
