that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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