And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
