elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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