If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize