Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize