he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
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