I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
