I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Randomize