isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
