Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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