Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
