I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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