There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
