:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
