Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
