i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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