see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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