Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
