why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
