i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
