There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
